Monday, July 30, 2007


I finished my first 10 mile run early Monday morning, bumping up from my previous long run of 8 miles. Currently I'm doing about 25 miles a week, split up between 4 runs - with the long run usually on Saturday. Some days I do speed runs, tempo runs, or hills - but all the experts says the 'long run' each week is the most critical part to marathon training.

It's kinda strange doing a 10 mile run - mostly because it takes about 2 hours to do. It really doesn't seem that long while you're running, but at the end you realize how much distance you've covered and how long you were gone. It was only about 70 degrees when I started around 6:30am - but by 8:00 it was getting warm. By my scale I lost 3 pounds during the run - aggressive sweating to say the least.

Also, I run along a trail down by the river - but it might as well be a zoo for all the wildlife I came across. Here's what crossed my path this morning:

  • 1 wild turkey (the animal, not the liquor)
  • 4 white-tailed deer
  • 1 giant turtle, the size of a football
  • 1 tiny turtle
  • 1 garter snake
  • 1 aging grandma in pink tights carrying hand weights
If I see a bear, I'm finding a new route. That's just not cool.

Friday, July 20, 2007

The Funk of Forty-Thousand Years (to life)

I guess when you're locked up in a Filipino prison, the only real thing to keep you occupied is to learn some kick ass Michael Jackson choreography. Well, that or hot gay sex. Either way, these fellas prove that idle time is the devil's playground.

So here it is, performed live from the Cebu Provincial Detention and Rehabilitation Center in the Philippines.

I have a tough time coordinating a haircut appointment....much less 1,000 inmates. But, I'd say it was a successful rehabilitation. Now they can rejoin society and get jobs as zombies.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Don't be a Slater Hater

To this day, the saddest moment of my life was when Kelly Kapowski dumped Zack Morris for that creep - Jeff the Jerk. In fact, from age 10 to 13, most of my life experiences were shaped by that lovable gang from Bayside High. I'm pretty sure the music video that Kelly, Lisa, and Jessie made for their singing group Hot Sundae single handedly pulled me through puberty. I can quote lines from every episode verbatim - and depending on the crowd, people find this incredibly awesome....or very sad.

When I was about 11 years old, I'd get off the bus and promptly head home for my favorite couch in front of the tv. From 4:00 - 5:30 everyday, it was wall to wall Saved By The Bell. The best part was that it would be on 3 different channels simultaneously - necessitating some careful maneuvering with the remote. I'd pick up the Chicago feed on WGN, then quick flip back to TBS on commercial breaks to catch a different episode. You might ask - 'shouldn't you have been outside playing with the other kids?' Well, they were all inside watching SBTB too. Only after all episodes were done would we convene for some Smear the Queer or kickball. (Do kids still play Smear the Queer? Or does it now have some PC name like 'tackle the alternative-lifestyle child'?)

Now in the 21st century - Saved By The Bell still lives on, and I've purchased the entire DVD collection. We've made a drinking game out of it in fact. For example, you drink every time Zack stops the space/time continuum by calling 'Time Out'. Or you chug whenever Jessie calls Slater a 'sexist pig'. You get the idea.

[Kelly Kapowski compilation. Was, and still is, my dream girl.]

Tonight I happened to come across the Saved By The Bell Wikipedia entry - and they had some fun facts I thought I'd share. Enjoy a walk down memory lane. If you're a true fan, you'll smile at most of these.

  • The Bayside Tigers school logo was actually a knockoff of the Detroit Tigers logo from the 1980s (it was colored maroon and said "Bayside" instead of "Detroit").

  • At the end of the opening credits Kelly completely misses the group high five.

  • One of the degrees in Mr. Belding's office is for kung fu. It is above the filing cabinet next to his desk.

  • The nerd characters usually have a last name that contains the word "nerd" or some synonym of it. ("Nerdstrom", "Poindexter", "Geekman", etc.)

  • Two classroom sets were used; each set was rearranged based on the subject of the class.

  • The episode "Day of Detention" was the last to be filmed for the original series. During the episode, Screech rigs the telephone lines for the radio station so he can take all the incoming calls in order to route Zach to the station lines to be caller number 10 to win a trip to Hawaii, however Screech fails to route the first 9 callers but the DJ states Zach is caller ten anyway.

  • Mark-Paul Gosselaar had to dye his hair blonde every two weeks while shooting the show.

  • The following are the SAT scores for the gang:
    Zack - 1502
    Screech - 1220
    Jessie - 1205
    Lisa - 1140
    Kelly - 1100
    A.C. - 1050
    **SATs are scored in intervals of ten which makes it impossible for Jessie and Zack to get the scores they got.

  • Lisa's favorite drink was a "Mango-Tonic with a Kiwi Twist."

  • Slater always sat backwards in his chair at the Max.

And to top it all off - here it is, the single greatest moment from all of Saved By the Bell. This was like porn for 11 year olds. I know that nerds older than me fixate their childhood lust on the Princess Leia/Star Wars bikini scene. But not nerds from my generation. Ladies and Gentlemen - I give you, Hot Sundae.

Monday, July 16, 2007

See Cody Run.

For those of you going through football withdrawal - and are impatiently waiting for football season to get underway, I've found something to wet your appetite. This is video of 12 year old Cody Paul abusing defenses up and down the field. They're referring to him as the 'White Reggie Bush' for his amazing vision and cuts. No doubt scholarship offers are in the mail.

Also entertaining - setting Pee Wee football to Pacman Jones's personal favorite - Make It Rain.

Cody’s runs

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Your moment of Zen

Your daily moment of zen comes from last night's MLB All Star game. Ichiro Suzuki, a Japanese born player, was named the MVP after his 2-run homerun. His reward? He was awarded an American car - a Chevy Tahoe. Is that Irony?

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

The summer wind

I'd like to be able to tell you all that I'm totally a Manhattan Insider, and can point you to all the trendy hot spots and swank nightclubs. Unfortunately, I'm still learning the turf - and tend to still do the tourist thing from time to time. However, I'm not nearly as bad as some of the tourist rubes you'll come across. It's not unusual to just be walking along and have a group of 5 people just stop dead in their tracks and start taking pictures of....a building. Any building. It doesn't need to be a famous one. Insert your own joke here about Japanese tourists with cameras and camcorders.

Anyway, last weekend my buddy Sipe was in town so we did NY from tip to tail:

Here is the view from our box seats at Yankee Stadium. Twins won, and I took pride in jumping to my feet in full Twins regalia each time a Twins homer went out or Santana struck someone out. Kinda got a few chills hearing the National Anthem sang at Yankee Stadium.

Our next stop was The Empire State Building. It takes about an hour to get through security and get up all the elevators to the top, but the view is definitely worth it.

The Chrysler Building on the left, and looking downtown on the right. The World Trade Center was right in the middle of that cluster of buildings. Those of you with careful eyes may be able to pick out the Statute of Liberty.

Looking down on the city. Just a few taxis.

A shot looking uptown - Central Park in the distance.

From there, we walked uptown and did a lap in Central Park. After seeing all the runners in the Park, it was all I could do not to take off with them and leave Sipe in my wake. Central Park really is all it's cracked up to be - tons of people just picnicking, throwing a Frisbee, and rolling around on the grass making out (two dudes were having a *very* good

Our last 2 stops were Times Square and Ground Zero. Times Square is like being in a glass of champagne - just popping and fizzing all around you. Lastly, as the sun was setting, we went down to Ground Zero. You can't really see a whole lot there, but they've definitely started rebuilding some new towers. A few makeshift memorials were scattered by the nearby NYFD station.

Ground Zero. Kind of eerie - but mostly just looks like a big construction site you'd see in any city.
Times Square. Neon signs, more neon signs, and lots of guys rapping on the street. There also is a GIANT Olive Garden.

Who goes to Times Square and eats at Olive Garden? Wait. What am I saying. Those breadsticks are ridiculous.

The only thing left to do was find a swanky hotspot and run up an obscene bar tab. Done and done.

Sunday, July 8, 2007

Your Sunday dance-off pants-off

To round off your weekend in style (or maybe jump start your Monday) - here are a few scintillating dance moves.

Some 60's soccer moms doing a Bob Fosse jazz dance, recast to some modern hip-hop. See the original here.

This guy Matt travelled the world, and took his bad dancing with him.

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

A Minnesota Adventure

I've just returned from a week or so in the old stomping grounds of Minnesota. The main reason for the trip was for the wedding of Mr. Josh 'Poop Paste' Powers...with some additional adventures thrown in. When you go back home, you gotta do the tour of your favorite restaurants (there are no Buffalo Wild Wings in Jersey), dentist, bank, stock broker, Grandmas, etc. Bloomington also now has it's first Chipotle - which is exciting.

The bachelor party was a golfing, poker playing, drinking, water skiing, general den of sin and gluttony. Thayer forced our groom to pound a beer on the 12th hole in an attempt to tank his golf didn't work. My golf team peaked around the 8th hole, and then the beer cart girl drove our golf game into the proverbial sand trap of life. We are also now likely banned from one particular 19th hole in Northern Minnesota....a true badge of honor for any bachelor party.

The reception was in the bride's back yard. Apparently it was 'beautiful' and there were flowers, but as a man - I didn't really notice. I think the chick I walked down the aisle with had it in her head I was a 'bad boy', so she said maybe a total of 50 words to me the entire weekend. If you're single at a wedding - like myself - it turns into a giant E-harmony commercial. I'm not a piece of meat! Well, maybe. Definitely a moment of pride when I was able to work a quote from Wedding Crashers into my speech at the Reception.

We tore up the dance floor, taught the Hustle, did the worm - the usual. I made a run at an Asian Sensation - but was rebuffed by the ever popular, "No - I've got to drive home." SHE WAS MY FIRST ASIAN! I think I also led a conga line, and managed to step on the bride's dress a good 20 or 30 times. Seriously - it's time to think about wedding dress mini-skirts.

In more recent news - Sipe flew in today, and we're headed to Yankee Stadium tomorrow. Box seats for Santana vs. Mussina - good as it gets. There are few things more satisfying than taking the subway to Yankee Stadium to see Santana dominate the Bronx Bombers. If there's time, we'll stop off at Coney Island to see Kobayashi take on Joey Chestnut in the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating contest. I think we'll spend the rest of the week sampling local restaurants, seeing Ground Zero, touring the Museum of Modern Art, Broadway, Times Square, and maybe the occasional libation. I'm also working somewhere in there.

As they say in the old country - L'chai-im. I'm not a talker. I'm not a talker.