Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Boston is Retahded

I've never liked Boston. Even before I moved to the New York area, I didn't like Boston. For so long that city sucked, at everything, and people liked them just because they were the loveable losers. But really, they've been winning sports championships for 8 years now, and the smug machine just keeps getting worse. I've never liked the, 'well, we deserved it' defense either.

I have these 2 friends that live in Boston. I sort of like them because they're loud and enjoy a tasty beverage. I also like them because they let me do my Matt Damon/Good Will Hunting Boston accent, and they don't get mad. I can't meet someone from Boston without saying "Irrrreeeegaaaaadless" a good 20 times. I love watching them get madder and madder as I start talking about how 'there's too much wataa in the pier' and 'I mow lawns for the paaarks depaahtment'. I went to this wedding a few years back, and the groom was from Boston. His Boston buddies came, and they were the biggest group of insufferable suckasses I've ever met. "Wow guys, it's sweet how you all have the same frayed and faded Boston Red Sox hat. So cool right now."

So, aside from my two friends, I've had just about enough of Boston's winning sports teams and the overwhelming self-satisfying shit smug-storm that's sweeping over the nation like an itchy wool blanket. Bill Simmons is the Conductor, and the entire Red Sox team are taking it in the ass bringing up the rear.

The only other redeeming factor is that Minnesota's Kevin Garnett got his championship ring. He was a straight up good guy for a long time in Minnesota sports, and he did the right thing in his post game interview when, very emotionally, the first thing he said was, "This is for all the people back in 'sota". Classy move, because he knows Minnesota did him a favor by trading him to a contender to give him his shot at a ring.

Ugh. Boston. GFYM.

1 comment:

Anonymous said... check this out. right around number 4.